


Have you seen you?

by dc4me44



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Angst, Day 3, F/F, Fluff, Romance, Swan Queen Week, garbage smells and carries diseases, it's a sq week why would I write about trash?, no h00s - they're garbage, swanqueenweek, this is only emma and regina
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-09
Updated: 2016-08-09
Packaged: 2018-08-07 16:22:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7721632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dc4me44/pseuds/dc4me44
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She should have known this would be a bad idea. How could she be so stupid to drag them here? Stupid, stupid, stupid. Now she was paying for that stupidity big time. </p>
<p>A one shot written for SQ week Day 3 - insecurity. As always no H00s</p>
            </blockquote>





	Have you seen you?

She should have known this would be a bad idea. How could she be so stupid to drag them here? Stupid, stupid, stupid. Now she was paying for that stupidity big time. 

 

She felt the green eyed monster of jelousy make its presence known once again. She looked to her left and saw that Regina was completely oblivious to what was happening around them. She was here enjoying the sun and the warm weather, not a worry in the world. Emma wanted to enjoy herself and enjoy Regina but she couldn't. There were eyes on them. Boys whistling and giving them lecherous stares. This should be illegal. She should have brought her badge with her. No bad idea it would just spur them on. She wanted to go swimming but was afraid to do so. She's almost sure as soon as she leaves the spot next to Regina at least 10 guys would fight to take her place. She just sighs and lays down mood completely ruined.

 

It was about to get worse though. For dinner they decided to relax at the local bar with a nice Hawaiian bar meal and some drinks. Only that not even half into their entrees the waiter kept bringing them drinks. The guy at the bar, those guys at that table, that lady with the white hat and on and on it went and Emma's mood was becoming darker and darker. By the time they got their mains Emma resorted to just pushing her meal around the plate not interested in eating.

 

Old insecurities started to make their way to the surface. What if she's just a pretty blonde distraction? She's not that pretty, nothing too extraordinary.  It's easy in Storybrooke, where Regina doesn't have many options. Sure with the land of untold stories being dragged into town there were a few more options than before, and Emma's not blind she saw the way that Esmeralda lady looks at Regina, and Emma doesn't like it one bit. But even so the options back home are limited. Here the place is filled with gorgeous looking men and women, and seems a lot of them showed an interest in Regina.

 

A warm touch on her hand brings Emma back to the present. Warm chocolate eyes, full of love, lock unto sad green eyes.

 

"What's the matter, Emma? Is your food all right? You've barely touched it. Are you feeling ok?"

 

"Yeah, it's fine and I'm fine. Don't have much of an appetite that's all."

 

Another 5 minutes passed in relative silence and Regina's had enough. This was meant to be a fun time for both of them, yet Emma was sulking for no apparent reason. Regina's almost finished with her meal, but Emma's barely touched hers, and this worries Regina. She starts to gather their things to go out of the bar when Emma snaps out of it.

 

"Wait, where are you going?"

 

"We are going back to our room. You're clearly not feeling well."

 

"I feel well enough." Emma really doesn't want Regina's night to be ruined for her sour mood. But Regina grabs her hand and leads her out of the bar. Emma doesn't fight it, she just enjoys the feeling of Regina's warm hand wrapped around her own.

 

"It's clear you didn't like it there. No reason for me to stay in a place that makes you unhappy."

 

They make their way across the beach in the sand. Emma just sulks behind Regina, because great not only is she subpar to everyone here, but she managed to somehow ruin Regina's night. She feels the sting of tears but she blinks them.

 

"We should go back there. They had an amazing drink I haven't tried," she's trying really hard to salvage whatever she can of tonight.

 

Regina stops and turns to Emma. She can now clearly see something was really bothering Emma and she can't figure out what. Emma just looks down at their intertwined hands.

 

"I'm sorry for ruining your night," and she feels like such a failure. Barely a day into their holiday and she's already messing it up.

 

"You deserve so much better than me."

 

And that’s' when Regina realizes that this is a serious discussion and that whatever was Emma was serious, and it probably came from deep down. Feelings of being abandoned, of not being good enough never really go away completely, and both Emma and herself struggle with these from time to time.

 

"Emma, no. Look I know you might not believe me but you, you are the best thing that happened to me. You and Henry are my world and so much more than I ever thought I'll deserve or think that I'll ever get. Teenage me, young adult me, Evil Queen me, pre-Henry me, even the me of a year ago, could not even dare to dream of having what I have with you and our son. Emma, if anyone should be scared of not being up to par it's me."

 

Emma scoffs at that.

 

"Emma you are amazing, inside and out and I love you, all of you, body and soul."

 

Emma sniffs at hearing Regina say that. She can't believe it. People always wanted something out of her: to break a curse, to be a leader, a happy ending, an easy way to redemption and heroism, or someone who they could rub in their enemy's face as an "I win, you lose, hahaha" kind of way. So much pressure, to be what people wanted her to be. She doesn't feel that pressure with Regina, but being here and seeing so many people be attracted to Regina, she can't help but feel she's taken her girlfriend up for granted, that maybe she should be more of everything Regina wants her, and really hang that leather jacket in the foyer closet, and leave her muddy boots outside not inside, and maybe clean those gutters while it’s still nice and sunny, and learn to cook stuff  and… Regina's grabbing her chin and softly lifting her head up so she can look into her eyes.

 

"Emma, I'll say it again. I love you. All of you. Not just your title, or what being with you can offer me. All I want is to see you happy, to see you smile. The fact that you love me in return is just an added bonus."

 

"Have you seen them? Have you seen me? I mean you could have anyone here without any effort."

 

"See who? Who is them? What should I see in others? Hmm?"

 

"I don't know. People here. They look so perfect, they're rich, they have bodies as of pulled from a magazine, they have flawless makeup, I don't know," Emma gives up frustrated.

 

"Why would I look at anyone? Emma, have you seen you? If we are to describe looks have you seen your amazing green eyes, your amazing blonde hair with those princess curls everyone dreams of? Have you seen your arms?"

 

"My arms?" Emma looks confused. No one ever mentioned her arms.

 

"Yes, your arms, they should be illegal. Not to mention your ass and your legs, I should ban you from wearing skinny jeans."

 

"Thanks for trying to lift my mood," Emma gives Regina a small smile.

 

"I wasn't trying to lift your mood. All last week I thought you were wearing sleeveless shirts and tight jeans on purpose to mess with me. You got me all hot and bothered."

 

"I wasn't doing it on purpose it was just hot outside. Wait, you were turned on by me wearing sleeveless shirts? Are you serious?"

 

"Again, have you seen your arms? I thought the amount of sex we had last week should have been a clear indication. Or this week. I can barely contain myself."

 

Emma's smile becomes genuine for a moment.

 

"I really don't see why I should be looking at other people, when my girlfriend is as amazing as they can come. And don't think I didn't notice those 2 guys by the pool yesterday eyeing you. Or that woman this morning at breakfast that just so happened to walk right into your arms."

 

"That was an accident," Emma's frowning trying to recall what Regina's been telling her. To be honest Emma didn't notice much except someone bumped into her and then helped them get up. Though now that she thought about it the woman did get way too close in her personal space.

 

"That was so not an accident. She was all over you, why do you think I stepped in?"

 

"Oh. I didn't notice. I really didn't care for her or anyone else you mentioned."

 

"Then why do you think I care for other people?" Regina says cupping her cheek and then pushing a lock of hair behind Emma's ear, trailing her finger down Emma's jaw and to her lips, caressing Emma's lips with her thumb.

 

"I don't have eyes for anyone but you, Emma. There are 7 billion people in this realm and few more billions in others but let me make it clear: I do not care for any of them the way I care for you. I love you, in a way I never loved anyone. You are not a teenage romance; you are not something dictated that I felt I had to choose thinking there's no other option. I did not chose to fall in love with you, and yet I did. I did not chose to love you, yet I have loved you from the moment I saw you and every day I loved you more and more and that scared me. But at the same time, I chose you. I chose to continue to let my love for you grow, and love you even when it seemed impossible you will ever look at me that way."

 

"Regina…" Emma's eyes start to fill with fresh tears.

 

"I didn't chose to love you, it just happened, but I have a choice in what I want to do about it and I chose to love you with everything that I have. I'm not with you as a last resort. I'm with you because I want you, because I want to be with you and no one else in this world or another, will ever measure up to you."

 

Emma's now letting her tears fall freely, she doesn't care. She just knows that she's never had anyone love her like Regina does, and she knows no one probably ever will. She wants to go for a kiss but what she ends up doing is hug Regina and rest her head on her shoulder crying.

 

"Oh, my Emma," Regina says as she tightens her grip around Emma holding her close. There will be a time for kisses later when they get back to their room, after Emma pulls away and starts to shiver in the cool night air, but for now she knows that all Emma needs is this hug and as always she'll give Emma anything she needs or wants.

 

 


End file.
